How To Use Free Mind, Part One: Creating A Simple Plot

It’s been a while since I blogged, and I thought I’d start blogging regularly again. The idea for this 3-part blog series came to me randomly while using the free mind map software called “Free Mind”, which you can download here (it lists the versions by operating system).

I’ve found mind mapping to be an effective way to just get an idea down on paper, without worrying about structure or character development or anything specific about the story. When you mind map a plot in particular, you just focus on the basics first and anything specific later.

The basic things you’d need for your mind map are:

·         Title

·         Main Character(s)

·         Conflict

·         Theme

·         Setting(s)

·         Genre(s)

 

For an example, I’ll show you the mind map process I’d use if I were to mind map an old story I wrote years ago, back when I had no clue what the rules of writing were. If I were to rewrite it now, it would need a major reworking of both the plot and the characters. But for the sake of the mind map example, it will also allow me to keep it simple.   

The story, at its core, was a coming-of-age fantasy (specifically, portal fantasy) novel, about a girl named Lucille who discovers a mystical doorway in a forest and a wolf chained by that door. The wolf—a shape shifter—explains that he has been waiting for years and years for someone to set him free and for that someone to journey back to the world beyond the door, and help him vanquish the evil. Now, we have our basic idea.

Opening Free Mind, you should get a blank mind map. If not, go to File> New to get a fresh mind map.

In the middle of the page you should get something like this:

 

 

 

       Click that circle and you should be able to edit the text inside the circle (called a “node”)

Here’s where we insert our title: SAPPHIRE PRINCESS. Depending on your novel, the title will be different. If you are still trying to figure out your title, put: WIP in the node bubble. To help figure out your novel’s title, I wrote a previous blog post on finding titles here.

Next, right-click that bubble and you should get a lot of options. Click the option with the light bulb, labeled ‘New Child Node’. A line should appear with a text box.

Label this text box: Main Characters.

 



Next, who are your main heroes? Do you have a name for them? If so, right-click the Main Characters node and click New Child Node (or press: Insert, on the keyboard) however many times to insert one or more main characters. In this case, I have at least four main characters: Lucille, who is the main heroine. Her mentors—the wolf-shifters—Akoto and Silver and, finally, the main villain, Resmiel.

Within each character’s text node, write as many attributes about them that you know. Age, gender, race, odd clothes or physical looks, favorite color or pet, anything specific to them within the story like powers, or their past, or their role within the story—anything that comes to mind.

If you can’t figure out something or if there is a reason for that trait important to the book, write the question or elaborated answer in a child node connected to that particular trait, like in the example below:

The next thing you should put in a node is: Conflict. Conflict could be as simple as your character missing the bus and having to get to their destination another way, or as complex as saving the world from alien invaders. A few questions to ask yourself when considering the different threads of conflict are:

·         What or who will your characters face in the story?

·         What will your hero have to face in regards to the villain?

·         What will he/she need to come to terms with?

·         What will tear her down, both physically and mentally?

·         What will be her goal/goals within the story?

·         What or who will stand in her way, in regards to succeeding those particular goals?

Create a child node from Conflict to include each main character. Then create nodes from their names, put a possible conflict or conflicts, and add additional details (in more nodes) if required. Some conflicts will involve each character or will be between two characters (such as the main hero and the villain). For this example, I’ve just done a few regarding the character Lucille.

 

Creating a new node from the title node, the next thing you will detail is: Theme. Theme is possibly the most challenging thing to boil down in a book. What are we trying to say, beyond all those perfectly constructed metaphors? What are we trying to tell the readers? What does this scene, this character, this idea, object or symbol contribute to the overall book, to the big picture—the theme of the book? Your theme could be anything from racism, to good vs evil to love conquers all…so long as the scenes and the plot reflect it.

Next would be Setting. Where does your story take place? What time period? What’s the name of your city or town or fictional world?  What details about the place(s) are important? Put them in nodes if needed.

 

 

Finally, the final node you can add is: Genre. What is your novel? Where would you put it on shelves? Would it be a paranormal romance? A fantasy? A historical? A science-fiction novel? As each genre has its rules and requirements regarding plot, it’s important you know what exactly you’re going to write. You can’t have novels straddling too many genres, otherwise it gets confusing for both readers and publishers to know exactly what group and to whom this book is marketed for.

 

Hopefully this process, while time-consuming, will be helpful in creating a sort of outline and a plot for your novel.

Stay tuned for part two of this series, How To Use Free Mind, Part Two: Figuring Out Character Conflict.

 

Thanks for reading!

- HC



Forked Roads and Man-eating Bears: Character Decisions

Decisions, decisions…

Characters have to make decisions—ones that set them on a journey at the start of the novel—otherwise there would be no story to tell. It’s usually a minor goal, something the character wants to do at first, before something—like an event or person—forces them on the overall focus, the overall goal for the novel itself.

For example, if a man—a reformed ex-con—decides to work as a janitor at a high school, he might come to work one day and find a body in one of the stalls. This spurs a whole new complication for your character: Is he guilty or innocent? Who really did it and why?

Connected to—or caused by—this minor goal, might be what’s called the inciting incident. The inciting incident is defined as the event that sends your protagonist out into the world, ruins or changes his current situation, and forces him to find answers—to answer the questions that this incident brought on, or to change things for the better. In our example with the ex-con janitor, finding the body in the stall is the inciting incident.

Likewise, character decisions must cause jeopardy and sacrifice or set in motion the inciting incident. For example, in Suzanne Collins’s dystopian fantasy trilogy The Hunger Games, Katniss Everdeen’s decision to go hunt illegally, to provide for her family, puts her at risk with the law. This decision (minor goal) helps when she is later put into the arena for the Hunger Games, to survive and fight others to the death—thus helping to save her family and world from poverty and oppression from the Capitol (overall goal).

In Christopher Paolini’s first high fantasy novel—book one of The Inheritance Cycle—Eragon, the elf Arya sends the dragon egg away via magic, from the main villain of the book (minor goal), but this event gets herself captured. The main hero, Eragon, finds the egg which begins his journey as a Dragonrider, to help bring down the tyrannical king, Galbatorix (overall goal).

Using yet another fantasy novel, in Tamora Pierce’s romantic fantasy series Song of the Lioness, the main heroine, Alanna of Trebond, decides to switch places with her twin brother, to dress as a boy, in order to allow him to go to the City of the Gods to train as a mage, and for her to travel to the castle to become a knight (minor goal). This decision puts her at risk, because she could be killed if her gender and disguise was ever found out. In the other novels of this series, Alanna’s knighthood allows her to protect the king and restore order to the world around her (overall goal).

Please note that this character decision-making can be applied to any genre—I was just using the ones off the top of my head—many of them being fantasy.

Most novels nowadays—regardless of genre—should have the character’s decision appear at the start or within the first chapter. Set your character on a journey and make them fight or suffer to reach their goal. Force them to change it, making a minor goal into something much larger, on a much larger scale—or force them to abandon that original goal entirely in order to fulfill this bigger, overall goal that should become the bulk of your novel’s focus.

Think of your character’s decision as a forked road metaphor. On one path, it’s rainy and cold but empty. On the other…maybe a huge man-eating bear lies somewhere on that path? Which path will he choose to reach his goal—to get home? The easy, raining one? Or the man-eating bear path?

Let’s say he decided to take the easy route—he’d get a little wet and cold, sure, but his path is clear, right?

Now, what if, on that easy path, you—the author—decided he needed a challenge to overcome? You don’t want your novel to be a simple, boring read do you? Let’s put the man-eating bear in his way—what is he going to do next? Run or fight?

Either way, this “easy” decision just shook this character’s world, changed his current situation, and forces him to face something much bigger them him—just as the inciting incident in your own novel must do.

When trying to decide your character’s decision that drives the novel’s plot, think of this metaphor. The minor goal in your novel—in this case, trying to get home—must be connected to, or cause, the inciting incident to appear. Pretty soon, that rainy route home should leave your protagonist confronting a giant, man-eating bear.

What happens to your hero next is up to you.

How To Create a Powerful Character Sacrifice

Sacrifice. For such a simple word, it carries a lot of power. And that’s what your own character’s sacrifice should do—be powerful, even if it’s simple; be memorable and resonate with readers long after they’ve closed the book.

But how do you do that?

A question you could ask yourself, while developing your novel, is: What is the character’s goal? Basically, what does she pride herself most in? What does he want most in the world?

A characters goal could be as simple as wanting a specific Christmas gift—like the protagonist of the classic movie A Christmas Story (1983) who, despite his family and his teacher’s claims that he’d shoot his eye out, wants a Red Ryder BB gun. Or the character’s goal could be as difficult and complex as destroying an object to save the entire world from destruction—such as Frodo’s quest to destroy the One Ring in J R.R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings trilogy.

Once you’ve found your character’s goal, define what stands in their way. What obstacles deter her from her path? What delays him from reaching his goal? This is where the antagonist comes in. Now, the antagonist in this case could also be an object or event—not just the main villain in your novel. In a scene, the antagonist could be your car not starting on an important day, a bad snowstorm, or when a monster appears.

Now, it’s important to have the main villain cause most of the trouble but, sometimes, the hero and villain have to be apart for some time—whether it’s because they are in different areas of the world, have different hobbies, or it wouldn’t work in the novel for the hero and villain to be in the scene together. Whatever the reason, the hero and the villain must deter each other and make things worse for each other—thus making things worse for them both. Which can play a big part in raising the stakes.

You’re probably asking yourself what do stakes have to do with character sacrifice? A lot. Good questions to ask while figuring out your stakes are: How can this get worse? Or, what if?

To raise the stakes for your character, the character must make choices and those choices must have consequences. What if her marriage ended and he got custody of the kids? What if the bomb went off and killed innocent people? To continue raising the stakes, making your character’s story stronger, beliefs must be put into question—and the character has to act against those beliefs. What if your character believes war is wrong and yet must incite rebellion to stop the enemy? What if your character must lie to save someone yet thinks lying is wrong?   

To continue raising the stakes in your novel, the character’s internal conflict must be at odds with the external conflict. The internal conflict refers to to personal, mental, or psychological conflict, whereas external conflict deals with the surrounding world—such as a storm or a war. Success in one conflict may mean failure in the other.

Raising the stakes—making things worse and more difficult for your characters—makes the hero stand out. What your hero must do, what he has to risk, to reach his goal, makes your normal main character worthy of the title “hero.” So, another question you could ask for your character’s development, is: What must my character do—what must he risk—to reach his goal, to get what he wants?       

There’s a reason the most powerful kind of sacrifice is self-sacrifice. Everyone, at some point, is afraid of death or not reaching their goals and, when someone gives up everything—even their goals, it speaks volumes. To create a powerful sacrifice for your main hero, create anything significant for the character, a source of support or happiness—family, friends, a cause, or an attribute. Then let them make a choice: What is most important? What is worth dying for? Put them in a situation where they must give up everything, or at least give up their goal, for their cause or to save those most important. Even if they don’t die, the hero will be changed forever from this act, their sacrifices will be powerful, and thus the book will be—to your readers—memorable.

Thanks for reading!

- HC

Creating Cultures In Fantasy: Beliefs

So you’re thinking of creating a fantasy race for your novel? As discussed in part one of this series, you choose the physical aspects of your race—you know what the creature looks like 24/7 or what it turns into on certain nights. Besides knowing the breeds of your fantasy race, one important aspect you should consider when creating a fantasy culture is the beliefs of the people. Who or what do they believe in? When creating a fantasy religion, there are a few things to consider.  

  

1.  Society    

What’s the core societal structure of your fantasy race? Before you begin to think about how the beliefs are structured, you should know the ins and outs of your culture.

First of all, how is the society organized? Are they a race that’s primarily patriarchal or matriarchal? Look within your fantasy culture’s myths and legends; see how the hierarchal structure is. Do the males inherit or do the females? Is there a reason—such as a god or a mythological prophecy—deeming which gender is meant to rule?

Or perhaps, there’s something physical that only males or females can do—such as, in Piers Anthony and Mercedes Lackey’s If I Pay Thee Not In Gold, only females can use the powers of conjuration—and thus allows them to have great power and influence in the culture. Find out if your own fantasy race has a gender-specific power and see if you can use that within the beliefs to enrich the culture, make it seem unique.

As with any real world religion, each culture has different views on sin and what is considered a sin. In your fantasy race’s culture, what is considered improper or vulgar? Depending on how your fantasy race is set up (hierarchy, the sources of power or income, and the line dividing the different class systems) take a look at the laws and limitations that you put on your race, and try to find something that would mock their systems or be different/odd to them. For example, in a fantasy race that prides itself on honesty and modesty; they may find telling lies, or showing too much skin in public, to be offensive.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, what are your race’s opinions on virtue? Again, depending on how your fantasy race is set up, take a look at the laws and limitations that you put on your race, and try to find something that they would find acceptable or good. Things such as kindness or honesty or a physical feature/attribute, for example.  

2.      Purpose

Greek mythology had many gods for many different purposes—Artemis was the virgin goddess of the hunt and of women, Aphrodite was goddess of love, and Hades, the god of death. Likewise, in your fantasy race’s beliefs, a god or gods must serve a purpose.

A few things to find out regarding the purpose of the god or gods in your pantheon are:

Myths. Who are your mythological creatures or people? Did they cause an event to happen— such as when Persephone was bound to the Underworld for six months creating winter, or where they the basis of a creature—like Arachne, a weaver who boasted her skill, was turned into a spider.  

What are you fantasy race’s views on creation and destruction? Which force or god is connected with each? Within a pantheon, there always seems to be that dividing line between good and evil, heroes and villains. In your pantheon is there a clear distinction between the heroic gods and the villainous ones or is there a gray area? It’s always good to have a mixture, to add depth and potential tension to the culture.

Speaking about creation and destruction, the powers of the gods should fulfill some key role in explaining how the world works, and how world incidents came to be. Which god or gods control life and death? Love or magic? How do the gods affect each other or connect in your pantheon to explain world events—such as the change of seasons, natural disasters, or the lunar cycle? Give each god a power (or multiple powers) and a reason for controlling that force. Consult your fantasy culture’s myths and legends and try to interweave the culture of the race deeply within this created pantheon.

3.      Worship/Ritual

In your world, your races beliefs can also be shown by the rituals they preform, the holidays and rites of passage they celebrate or things that are shown in your world such as signs and statues. A few things to consider when creating rituals in your fantasy religion are:

Color: The symbolism of color can play a key role in the culture and thus also in the rituals they perform. Different colors also have cultural significance to the reader, such as red for blood and death or purple for royalty. This chart lists different colors and the common associations with each.

Fruit/Vegetables: Fruits eaten or shown during rituals also have cultural/religious significance. Depending on your myths and legends, certain fruits and veggies might symbolize certain gods or invoke certain things such as pomegranates (in Greek myths) symbolizing long life and rebirth.

Symbols: Think of certain symbols such as a sword or a crown and apply them to your culture. Depending on the ritual and the god(s) being called upon, there may be many different symbols attributed to them, such as a loom or a hammer for a god of trade or a shield or arrow attributed to a god of war. If there are many symbols, be specific in the way they are used, and choose one universal symbol for each god to avoid confusion for the reader.

The next topic in our 4-part Fantasy Culture Creation series is “Powers”. Besides creating the physical appearance and beliefs of your fantasy race, it’s important to look over the powers of your race—the magical and physical abilities that can make your race stand out from all the standard races of fantasy and make the creatures your own.

Creating Cultures in Fantasy: Part 1: Breed

Anyone who reads even a little bit of fantasy knows that fantastic or mystical races are a common element to the genre, easily as common as magic. If you’ve read books like Lord of the Rings, or Dritzz Duordan, you know how easily a well constructed, original culture can elevate a story to a whole other level of greatness. Where would LOTR be without the furry footed Hobbits of Hobbiton, or the creepy creature Golom? What would the Elvin race, rather white as they were before him, be without the last black elf called Dritzz? But have you noticed that when it comes to fantasy, but for a few exceptions, most books feature the same beings? Vampires, werewolves, faeries, Elves, Dwarves. And few new authors bother to develop a culture behind their race, a deep and complex system of habits, taboos, and beliefs. At least if authors added a few cultural quirks to their vampires or faeries, they would feel a little more original. I think that’s because for most, the concept of building an entire race from the ground up is such a daunting task that it’s too overwhelming for most. But could you imagine developing your own culture and having it become so much a part of the world’s consciousness that everyone, everywhere knows it by name? A writer’s dream come true, that. But in this day and age, when there are so many other stories to compete with, how can one hope to stand out from the crowd and get noticed? And with the endless possibilities that could go into the creation of whole race, how can you be sure you have a winning combination?

The task of building an entire culture from the ground up is a massive undertaking and a huge topic, enough that I’ve decided to collaborate with fellow FTLOW author and veteran creator Madelaine Bauman, to bring you a 5 part blog on the subject.

After talking with Maddie, we saw that there are literally dozens of elements that can go into a single race. Consider the real cultures of our world. Every race on this planet has a way of dressing, thinking, acting, that is as different from the others as light is to day. All over the world, everything our many cultures do differs, from the music we listen to, to the language we speak, from our faith to what we eat, to the way we view other races. In many cultures, there are various sub-cultures, sometimes with a different dialect of the same tongue, sometimes with slightly altered belief systems, ones that to us, seem like a different shade of the same hue, but to them, seems a vastly different as light and dark. What one culture considers the norm another might consider an enormous taboo. With so many possibilities, how does one even know where to start? Not to mention, races in fantasy have other layers that those of this world do not. The race in your story may have other features besides human, and may also have magic or other abilities that make it even more complex than the races of our world. After much discussion, Maddie and I decided that creating an effective fantasy culture can be broken down into five basic components: Breed, Beliefs, Powers, Language, and Purpose. I don’t think development has to go in that order, but I personally find it easiest to start by giving my new race a face, or, more definitively, a physical framework to build from. So for this first installment, we’ll discuss Breed - that is, what physical traits your beings should have.

For those of you who’ve been reading me for a while, you know I’m fond of breaking things into smaller steps. It makes it easier to organize a larger topic. Where we've cut the construction of a race into four sections, the subject of breed is also broken into parts. For me, it breaks down into three. Relatability, appeal, and plausibility. 

To my mind, the physical aspects of creation is perhaps the most difficult. This is partially because of the sheer scope of possibilities. Are your beings bi-peddle or four legged? Do they have smooth skin, scales, fur or something else? Do they have claws? Wings? Two eyes or eight? The other reason this aspect is so difficult is that there’s a fine line between coming up with something unique and interesting, and something that is still relatable to readers.

Consider what’s been done. The most common ancestry seems to be birds, bats, wolves, and winged insects (faeries). When creating a race, a first step toward making it unique can be to use a creature or traits that haven’t been used much, or combine several. Winged beings are all too common, but why not give your beings the wings of a bird, and the pointed ears of an elf? And throw in blue skin just for fun? Many novice writers who try to create a new race will use a more unlikely creature thinking that it will score them points on the originality meter. They’ll give their beings a half spider form, or make them look like a hybrid of a worm and a human. Nine times out of ten, that won’t work. So many of us are unsettled by creepy crawlies that beings who possess too many such traits will be an instant repellent and not at all easy to relate to. I’m not saying certain traits from any creature can’t work. Who doesn’t love Spiderman? I’m a firm believer that anything can work if it’s used right. In the case of Spiderman, the idea of a man with the abilities of a spider worked because, other than his ability to sling webs and scale walls, he was a normal everyday guy. That and there was nothing horrifically gross about him. He didn’t spit acid out of his mouth, or molt his skin like a snake. Yuck. Your beings have to be relatable, and like it or not, that means giving them some human traits that make us see them the way we see ourselves.

I think there’s a second reason certain creatures are overused – it’s because they’re safe. We already know people will accept Vampires and Werewolves. Creating a new race with as yet unused traits is risky. Readers might not be able to suspend their disbelief enough to accept them. They might be seen as b-movie material. But if you combine features the right way, and you put it right on the page, readers will accept anything. It’s all about the appeal of the race and the writer’s ability to make a reader believe in what they say. Which brings me to the second part of the segment.

When I say appeal, I’m not referring to whether or not readers find your new race of people attractive. I’m talking about whether or not they have a mass market appeal. So, whether or not your beings will be accepted by a wide range of readers. The trick to creating a race of beings that appeals to many is to give them traits that appeal to most humans. I know it sounds shallow, but that’s why creatures with eight legs or a head full of eyes is so hard to pull off, and if they are used, they’re usually villains or henchmen, temporary challenges for the heroes to overcome, without big roles or heavy interaction. We as humans have a hard time relating to that. You can still avoid your people being overly attractive or generic without making them so unusual that people can’t take it seriously.

Consider the concept of a Werewolf. A huge, hairy creature that mauls and kills people. How is that attractive? But why does it work? Because Werewolves are only like that part of the time. In most stories that feature a werewolf, the character is human for the bulk of the time, perhaps with certain traits of the wolf left over while in man form, like heightened senses or super speed, the kind of traits that makes people look badass. Not to mention, predatory animal traits in a sexy package generate a massive hottie appeal. :D. *Wipes drool from mouth* (Actually, I don’t like werewolves or vamps, but I love creating races with badass animal traits, and if used right, they are sexy).  

Getting back on track, if you combine human traits with those of another creature without losing the being’s humanity, you make it easier to believe in. Which brings us to the third and final element. Plausibility.

If you think about it, any being with human and animal traits combined seems a little far fetched. Take a mermaid. A being with the head and torso of a woman, (a man if it’s a Merman) and the tail of a fish? How weird is that? And yet, stories the world over tell of these half fish beings who live in the sea, and people love them. Why? Partially it’s because we have the other two elements, relatablity and appeal, at work here. Mermaids are just human enough to see as being like us, but just “fish” enough to seem exotic. Plus they come from a place that is universally mysterious and still relatively unexplored. This adds to the mass market appeal and the exotic allure of a race. But Mermaids are also effective because, from the perspective of readers who like to escape into a fantasy world, they seem plausible. The sea’s largely unknown depths leave open the plausibility necessary for readers to suspend disbelief enough to accept the concept. Plausibility in creating a new and original race lies in cultivating the ever tantalizing question all humans have in the back of their minds - What if. It lies in starting with the seed of an idea and then building off it by answering other questions. Other questions that spark our curiosity and make us want to learn more. Questions like, if you create a race, how do they act? What do they believe in? What might their religion be like? How different might they’re every day lives be from ours? When we begin to explore these concepts, that’s when a whole culture starts to come to life in our minds. 

This Monday, Madelaine Bauman continues our blog with Part 2: Beliefs, through which she’ll delve into perhaps the most interesting aspect of building a race, developing a belief system that will keep your readers wanting to learn more, and offer your story a real world feel that makes your readers forget the world they’re in is just a fantasy.

Make Your Dialogue Come...Alive!

Oh, yeah. Dialogue. For most of us, it's the deal-breaker in a novel. You can have a great plot, lots of action, great locations, well thought out worlds and lots of twists, but if your dialogue is flat or unrealistic, it's like too much baking powder in your favorite homemade cookies. It ruins the whole experience. I've done a lot of research on making dialogue more real, as well as more memorable, and I found some interesting tips.

Let’s start with the simpler part, the realism. In the old days, dialogue was often longer and more drawn out. If you read books like Lord of the Rings, you noticed lots of long speeches. In older books, sometimes a single character’s dialogue could go one for a paragraph or more without a break. These days it's more back and forth; quick, snappy exchanges where one character speaks, then the second, then back to the first.

Think of it as a game of catch. In the game, when someone throws you the ball, do you stand there for several minutes, or even 30 seconds, holding the ball before you throw it back? No. Most of us would throw it back immediately, and our partner does the same. Dialogue works the same way. If you ask someone a question, and they go on for several minutes, you'd probably want to cut them off. Likewise in a story. If you have long speeches without interruption from another character, readers will grow impatient and lose interest. Keeping dialogue short, snappy, and back and forth will keep readers from getting bored.

When it comes to realistic dialogue, there are a lot of aspects to consider in order to maintain the reader’s interest. Adding tension, holding things back, avoiding dialogue tags, and using memorable lines, what writer and literary agent Donald Maass calls "zingers." But first, we'll focus only on the back and forth aspect.

Here's an example. First, we have dialogue with longer exchanges. Our characters for this exchange are Lance and Drake.

"What did you do, yesterday, Lance?"

"Well, I went to the store for mom, washed the car, and then went to my girl friends for a movie."

Drake shrugged. "Cool."

Oi. Can anyone see what's wrong here? Let's start with, BORING. People don't talk like that in real life, at least not if they want any friends. And in a book, we want to see something more interesting than average in our characters anyway. Which means we'll have to do a lot better than that to impress readers.

There are other problems here, no tension, nothing to grab us, nothing to make us want to find out what's going on, but dialogue is a many layered thing, so let's go a step at a time here, and fix the back and forth issue first. 

To most of you, it likely looks like Lance is the problem. He's the one with the longer boring line that has nothing interesting in it. People do those things every day, and they certainly are realistic, but again, readers want something above average, a character who does things that make us want to be in their shoes. Also, there's nothing to make us ask questions, keep us guessing. Also, notice another problem. Lance's bland reply doesn't leave much for Drake to say. This is where writers sometimes get stuck, unsure how to continue, what to have a person say next. There’s no energy here, no life to keep the story going, so it dies. So, let’s kick it up a notch. 

"What did you do, yesterday, Lance?"

"Hung out with my girl."

Drake shrugged. "That's it? Just, "hung out?"

"Yup."

See what happens here? Already it's a little better. This is a classic case of less is more. We left out the more boring parts, plus Lance told very little about what went on, which does two things. It makes us wonder what he did that he's being so dismissive, and it also makes us curious about the character. It gives him a personality. We wonder if he's just one of those mono- syllabic guys who just doesn't like to open up, or if there's more going on here. Such as, he's being deliberately coy. Plus, Lance’s reply is more engaging, which gives us more to work with in Drake’s reply. Furthermore, Drake presses him, and he doesn't give him anything, which not only adds to Lance's mystery, but makes readers want to know more. In writing, we call that "hold backs." Making it difficult for characters to get the information they want adds mystery and evokes questions in the reader’s mind.

You’ll have to forgive me for using the same example throughout this exercise. I’m working on a layering principle, adding elements in stages, and that’s easier to do that using the same one.

So here, we have two elements of at work. The use of withholding information to keep the reader guessing, and the use of short, back and forth beats that give the story a fast pace. But even so, this could be a lot better. Even Drake's lines are a little dry. Why? Because they don't paint a picture of his character. So let’s jack his up a bit.

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?"

"Hung out with my girl."

Drake smiled. "That's it, eh? You just hung out?"

"Yup."

This is a lot more interesting, yes? Where Lance's simple, one word answers might suggest something deeper, Drake's responses add to that. Now we have a sense of his character as an observant, and perhaps nosy friend, who insists something went on last night, maybe even when it didn't. By simply putting the emphasis on "you" we get that he's almost taunting Lance. And by making his actions more intriguing, a smile instead of a shrug, our interest is also piqued. Drake's imagination is running wild, and as such, so are ours. Which makes us want to know. Is Drake just the kind of guy who reads something into everything, is he just razzing Lance, or is he right? And if he is right, what did happen with Lance and his girl? We could even dig deeper as readers and wonder if the girl has a reputation, or if Drake knows Lance and her relationship is such that when they get together, highjinks ensue. Depending on the type of book, it doesn't always have to be the obvious either. But can we still make it better? Oh yes. Always. But before we amp up the dialogue again, lets move onto our next point. Dialogue tags.

Effective dialogue relies on a lot of things, but a big element is timing. Timing is what allows us to maintain a fast pace, hold the tension throughout the prose, and to a large extent, give the exchange a feeling of realism. One of the keys to good timing in dialogue is to avoid dialogue tags where possible, instead exchanging them with action beats. Dialogue tags "tell" rather than "show," telling the reader what to take from the exchange, rather than letting them see it in the prose. They also force us to use more words, and passive ly and ing words, which weaken the writing if used without need. They also kill the pace and drain tension, thus losing the reader's interest. Timing is perhaps the hardest part of employing realistic dialogue. One too many words or one weaker word disrupts the flow, which throws the whole exchange out of balance. Here, let me show you.

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?" Drake taunted.

"Hung out with my girl."

"That's it, eh?" Drake said doubtfully. "You just hung out?" 

"Yup."

You can see the issue here. When dialogue is effective, the tags are unneeded, because it's often clear who is speaking without it, and the reader can infer the character’s tone by how his dialogue is worded. Tags have their place, but action ones add more to the story. They let us see what's happening rather than telling us what to see, and they allow for fewer words. They also allow more active tenses instead of passive, which makes the writing stronger and increases pace, as well as maintains tension. The trick with action tags is not to overuse them. So, let’s spice it up with action tags instead. Ready?

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?" Drake wiggled his brows.

Lance doodled on his paper and didn’t look up. "Hung out with my girl."

"That's it, eh? You just hung out?"

Lance resisted a grin. "Yup."

See how much more character that gives to Drake and Lance? Where the dialogue tags killed pace without even giving them much personality, those action tags allow us to character build and paint an image of the boys without slowing the story down. The dialogue tags wasted valuable characharization time, whereas the action beats enhanced the reading experience. And remember the first time I used that example at the start of this? See how much deeper the story and characters are, compared to that bland, flat exchange at the start?

When it comes to actions, the hard part is knowing when and how often. A good rule of thumb is, if action beats do nothing for the story, leave them out. It's also key to avoid using long action tags, as well as too many. Actions should be a separate sentence from the dialogue. This allows for tighter wording and shorter sentences, which gives the whole thing more impact. Longer or attached actions break up the flow and make the dialogue feel choppy, less like a real conversation. If I had used anymore than I did, or if I connected them to the dialogue itself, it would have taken away from the snappy, back and forth feel and ruined the timing, killing the tension and pace.

Which brings us to the next point. Tension. My readers know how big I am on this. It's what keeps readers glued to the page. Part of tension is hold backs, but part of it is adding elements to the exchange that engage us and make us, not just want to know more, but need to know more. The last exchange had tension, but we can make this really pop by adding more. One level of tension is using words that carry more impact. Stronger verbs, shorter sentences, avoiding unnecessary descriptions, and showing, not telling. But tension can be intensified by adding layers to the prose. We do this using two elements, emotion and character or plot arcs. Don’t roll your eyes at seeing the same example yet. It gets better. Watch.

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?" Drake wiggled his brows.

Lance doodled on his paper and didn’t look up. "Hung out with my girl."

Drake snorted. This again  "That's it? With the most popular girl in school, you just hung out."

Lance resisted a grin. "Yup."

Notice that I didn't actually mention an emotion. Drake's doubt is there, his curiosity, his irritation, but I didn't tell you it was there, I didn't say it. It's all in the dialogue and action, and in this case, in Drake's thought, "this again." It's the subtlety that makes the conversation feel as if we are a fly on the wall watching it all happen. From Drake's snort and his thought, we get that Lance does this all the time, and it drives Drake nuts. We can sense his irritation without being told he's irritated, and slowing the story down. Also, our imaginations are really going now. Is Drake the kind of guy who causes trouble when you tell him too much? There's all sorts of ways this can go wrong, and there in lies the tension. Tension is the anticipation of something about to happen. Telling the emotions or having longer tags would take the focus away from the important things, what's being said, and so lose the tension. If you embed the movement of the story and the tension in the dialogue and actions, it keeps the dialogue real and fast-paced.

Now, just for comparison sake, here’s the first use of the exchange, before we made it matter.

"What did you do, yesterday, Lance?"

"Well, I went to the store for mom, washed the car, and then went to my girl friends for a movie."

Drake shrugged. "Cool."

Wow. Look at that, and now look at the last one.

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?" Drake wiggled his brows.

Lance doodled on his paper and didn't look up. "Hung out with my girl."

Drake snorted. This again. "That's it? With the most popular girl in school. You just hung out."

Lance resisted a grin. "Yup."

Huge difference, yes? But, would you believe we can still make this better? How? By employing “zingers.” In Writing the Breakout Novel, Maass describes these as unexpected one-liners that make a character stand out and make the dialogue leap off the page.

Zingers are a little more complex, but think of them as a punch line to a joke. There's build to them, a certain setup and delivery, and timing is extra important here.  Wait too long or not long enough, use one too many words or the wrong ones, and you lose the whole effect. But like a well delivered punch line, zingers rely on an added element. Surprise, or more definitively, a twist.

Now, to employ a really effective zinger, the conversation needs to be a little longer, so as to allow for the proper set up and build.  Watch this.

"Sooo, what did you do, yesterday, Lance?" Drake wiggled his brows.

Lance doodled on his paper and didn't look up. "Hung out with my girl."

Drake snorted. "That's it? You just hung out."

"Yup."

Drake shook his head. "Ugh uh. There had to be more. Tell."

Lance said nothing.

Drake squeezed one eye shut. "So let me get this straight. You went out with the most popular, hottest girl in school, and you, what? Watched paint dry?"

Lance looked at him and a smile twisted his lips. "Oh there was paint. And balls. And a gun."

Zing! That really makes the dialogue and characters come alive. Lance's playful line does several things at once. It shows he has spontinaity and wit, thus adding to his personality and endearing him to us. It adds to the tension of the passage, thus driving us on. And it further hooks us, making us want to know more. Now we can guess what he and his girl were doing. It was probably paint ball, not at all what Drake thought. That’s your twist. The careful wording and the flow of it makes for the effective delivery. But we also want to keep reading to see Drake's reaction. That revs the tension up several notches. Also, what they were doing is as unexpected as the line itself, which acts as its own force, because it elevates Lance's and his girl's relationship to something deeper than what Drake, and thus, we, expect. The layers we added to the dialogue in the previous runs turns what started out as bland, uninteresting dialogue into something engaging and exciting. But Lance's well timed, well worded zinger takes it to another level, enhancing the reading experience even further.

These days, dialogue can’t just be realistic. It has to take us away from the norm, introduce us to interesting people, and keep us riveted in the story. So, first, make your dialogue real. Then, give it something more. Make it stick out in our minds. Make it leap off the page. 

Until next time everyone, write on!

Building Effective Heroes

Earlier in the week my FTLOW sister ReeVera did a post on identifying your hero, listing attributes that make a character a hero, as well as the traits that are often mistaken for those of a hero, but aren't.  Here, in a second part to that post, I'll explain how to create effective heroes your readers will want to read about again and again. Since I write fantasy, and some of the requirements for fantasy heroes are different than for other genres, most of my tips revolve around that, but many of them apply to other genres too.

Creating an effective story hero or heroine is as hard as creating any other main character, be it a protagonist, a villain, a love interest or a sidekick. In fact, if the hero happens to be the MC, it's harder, because they're the person the reader has to identify with and care about the most. Equal only to the villain at least in a fantasy, they also have to stand out the most in the reader's mind. It should be understood that while heroes are generally thought of as brave, bold, moral, and strong, this alone is no longer enough. Readers look for something deeper in their heroes than they did in the 80's, when characters were either good or bad, strong or weak. Such characters now come off as cliche, one dimensional, and even cheesy. So how do you create a hero who makes a lasting impression and is immediately likable to your reader? Here's some tips I've found.

Make your hero human

I'm not referring to race, here. If you write fantasy or sci-fi, you might want a hero who isn’t actually human. What I mean is, give them human qualities. Even if they are an angel from heaven, or even a god, don't make your hero perfect. Have them make mistakes, and pay the price, fall on their face, argue, or be temped by evil. If it fits the plot, perhaps even have them turn evil. Just make sure that when they do make mistakes, there are consequences, and they face them. And if they turn evil, have them come back from it in the end. Also, have your hero effected by loss, pain, injustice or evil. Make them feel sad when they lose a loved one, angry when the villain hurts someone, frustrated by major setbacks, strike out when someone beats them down. Strong heroes are great, but if they don't have moments of weakness or believable emotional reactions, they won't feel relatable. Machines don't feel pain or emotions, and God is perfect, but in stories, the reader should sometimes forget the cybernetic hero is a machine, and even gods mess up once in a while.

Give him/her a quirk

Oddities and unique attributes are a great way to make a character stand out. This can be something as simple as a habit of rubbing her temples when she's under stress, pinching his nose when he's frustrated, playing with the hair or a necklace when nervous. Or it can be something more complex, like an obsession with monkeys, or a strong dislike for a certain television show.  Aside from making the person unique from your other characters, when used correctly, these can help to identify the hero when he speaks without telling it in tags or descriptions, create interesting dialogue, enhance personality, and make them feel more real. Everyone has a quirk. So should a hero. 

Give your hero a dream/goal

Everyone who's been reading me for a while knows how much I love to pull tips from writer and literary agent Donald Maass, especially those from his book, Writing The Breakout Novel. One of the first things Maass tells us in his section on characterization of a hero is to make your hero want something. In any good story, in any genre, the main character has some sort of struggle they must overcome. There is something they want, so badly that they're willing to face impossible odds to obtain it. It's integral to a good plot to have your main character driven by some overwhelming need. This creates strong personal conflict, and either builds the foundation for the main conflict, or produces a secondary conflict that enhances and adds depth to the main one. Also, lack of ambition or personal stakes can make the most otherwise dynamic character seem flat and drain an otherwise great storyline of tension. The hero's goal or dream can be the need to cure a loved one, fly to a distant planet, save a pet, get a certain job, get revenge on a villain, or finally get the girl of his dreams to give him the time of day. Conflict or something at stake is what keeps readers wanting to see how things turn out. It creates the struggle that is at least part of the basis for your story, or sometimes it's entire focus. It's the reason the hero must get the girl, return home, get the job, or save someone they love. In some cases, it can also be an added motivation to stop the villain, on top of the moral need to set things right, because unless they complete the struggle, they can't reach their personal goal. Dreams do not have to be huge or lofty, but it should suit the hero and set the tone for the character. They should also be something the hero can't stand to lose.

Make your hero suffer.

What makes a hero's dream matter to the reader, and what makes them want to see the hero obtain that dream, isn't just that it's important to the hero, but that they must overcome constant obstacles to obtain the dream they're after. This is what makes readers root for the hero, want to see them win. If your hero has nothing driving them, nothing personally at stake, there is no struggle. If there is no struggle, the reader has no reason to want to see the hero win. Likewise, if everything comes too easy for them, readers lose interest. So give your hero a goal or dream, and then make sure you find ways to let them get only so close before it's pulled away from them until the end. The back and forth struggle will keep readers wanting to read on in order to see if the hero gets what he or she has been working for the whole novel to achieve.

Make your hero strong..but not too strong

Along with making your hero suffer, it's important to make them a strong, determined personality. They need to be someone who won't turn tail at the first hint of danger or whine about everything that goes wrong. This doesn't mean they don't feel fear. It means they keep going in spite of it. This doesn't mean they don't ever complain or that everything is roses all the time. It means they note their misgivings when necessary and then do something about it. It also means they defend what's right even when no one else will, even when it could, and sometimes does, cost them everything.In addition, where possible, if you can rob the hero of what he or she cares about the most without destroying the plot, do it. Just be sure they find a way to resolve the loss in the end. Creating suffering for the hero brings more obstacles to face, and the more your hero overcomes, the stronger and more heroic they will be to the reader.

Make your hero someone to look up to/Larger than Life

One of the fastest ways for readers to identify the hero in a story is that it's the person who always takes extraordinary actions to set things right. Every time something major happens that forwards the plot and brings the hero closer to the resolution, it should be an action on the part of the hero. Heroes need friends and should rarely get to the end of the journey on their own, but the most profound actions should be the hero's. It's ok if a hero is saved by others, but not all the time, and not without the hero trying to do it his or herself, taking actions that, without having done, the rescuer couldn't rescue them. Make your hero stand up and take actions no one else would. Make them proactive. Make them bold and defiant. This is a key factor in what makes us see them as heroes, what makes us want to be them.

Create a fear/weakness for your hero

While heroes should be brave and take on challenges others would never face, they should also be afraid of something. Fearless heroes are great in theory, but that's rarely to be taken literally. Your hero's fear doesn't have to be a phobia, though it can be. A fear can be that of losing a loved one, of a certain object or animal, a particular nightmare, or a fear that something horrible that happened before will happen again. If there is a fear or weakness that holds the hero back from resolving the conflict, it adds tension to the story, depth to the character, and provides ways to make their overall struggle more powerful. If it's placed right, it will also enhance the degree of suffering the hero must endure, thus evoking stronger emotions from the reader. I should note that, while it's fine if your hero's fear is paralyzing, the fear should be something that the hero eventually overcomes, especially in this case, and it shouldn't hold them back to the point where they won’t take action. Cowardice is not an admirable trait. Also, the hero's fear should be something that ties into the main plot and keeps them from the resolution in some way, even if it's only for part of the time. If it’s integral to the plot to have the hero held back from the goal by his or her fear until the end, that's fine, but make sure they always find another way around the fear and keep heading toward the goal. This will allow you to show the hero's fear and make it powerful without them coming off a coward, and it will make the hero's triumph over the fear in the end a stronger victory for the reader.

Make your hero weaker than the villain

I've heard people say that a hero should always be the villain's equal. In some ways this is true. The hero should be able to take the villain on, and in most cases, win in the end. But if the hero starts out as the villain's perfect match, the villain ceases to present a challenge (While you're here, check out this post on what makes villains memorable from Madelaine Bauman). In order to create conflict, it's essential that the hero have difficulty overcoming the major obstacles the villain presents. Whatever your villain's strengths and skills are, at least some of the hero's counterpart strengths and skills should be weaker. Much weaker at the start, and growing closer to equal as the story goes on, thus making it harder for the hero to defeat him, while at the same time, drawing the hero closer to their resolution.

Give your hero strong dialogue

Have you ever been in a situation where you had the perfect comeback right there, screaming to be said, but you didn't have the guts to say it until it was too late? Or, the perfect gem of a reply didn't come to you until long after the moment is lost? In real life, we rarely get a second chance to deliver our genius one liners until the bully is gone, or give that perfect pickup line until well after the guy or girl of our dreams has already walked away.  But in a book, you have that chance. You can pause and take time to consider what the hero will say when the villain puts him down, the abusive husband beats his wife, or the most popular girl is still standing there waiting for the hero to say something smooth. Is there something you have always wanted to say, but you didn't because you knew it would get you in trouble? Make the hero say it! Is there something you'd kill to tell the woman you've been mooning over for months, but you know you'd never be able to pull it off without going red or the words coming out bass ackwards? Make the hero say it! Like quirks, well thought out lines and unexpected zingers make memorable heroes that stand out from the crowd and make us fall for them every time.

Next to the villain, effective heroes are the hardest characters to create. It's difficult to strike the delicate balance between morality and temptation, humanity and larger than life traits, strength and weakness, fear and bravery. It's so easy to overdo one trait and end up with an unlikable or unrelatable personality. But if you imagine your hero as someone you and your readers can aspire to be, yet still identify with, if your hero faces and takes on challenges you only wish you could overcome, you'll build a hero readers will love and never forget.

So tell me who is your hero? Whether in a story or in real life, who do you look up to most and why? Share with us. One day, someone might name your character as their hero.

Until next time everyone, write on!